Pruning Roses - Teaching About Overwhelm

Pruning Roses and a teaching about overwhelm

Today I was pruning the roses … a task that requires attention and focus – what to cut, where to cut, how to cut, how not to get scratched and ripped by the thorns.  It is a task that requires me to be present, consciously thinking about what I am doing.

A particular rose bush had many branches, closely intertwined and twisting over each other with vicious thorns.  I looked at it and felt waves of overwhelm … not knowing where to start and how to prune this bush without getting attacked by its thorns.  This is not my normal state – I am practical and grounded and can usually find a way to tackle most problems. I can usually find a way in … but this was different as the thorns were particularly sharp, numerous and congested.  I really felt as if the thorns were fighting me.

As I pruned the rose bush it taught me some valuable lessons.  Firstly, why was I doing it?  It was to help it bloom in the summer – pruning helps improve the health of the plant and its lifespan.  The healthier a plant is, the more likely it is to flower in the summer months.

Secondly the overwhelm… have you ever noticed that some people when overwhelmed seem to fight you? You try to help them, yet every suggestion you make is thwarted, dismissed or argued against.  This is what the thorns seemed to be teaching me – that for some people attack you when they are in overwhelm as it seems to them the only way for them to cope and manage … taking in anything else is literally too much so it is batted away and ignored.  It is a natural defence to a nervous system that is in overload.  Maybe this is you?  Maybe this is your partner, close friend or family member.

Overcoming overwhelm is like pruning this particular rose bush.  Piece by piece – clearing out the deadwood; pruning back; cutting back the branches that cross over and cause confusion until you can start to see the shape and form that the rose bush will take.

So if you are currently facing an overwhelming situation, and tend to fight may I suggest the following …

-       Take some deep flowing breaths and connect to the ground below you

-       Be clear with yourself about what you are trying to achieve

-       Be curious about how others might do it

-       Slowly and methodically identify the tasks you need to complete

-       Prioritise which ones need to be done first and make a plan which you can follow

In addition, there a few things you can do to support yourself energetically

-       Hold your Bladder 1 points this will help calm your nervous system

-       If you are a high caffeine drinker consider swopping the teas and coffees for something more soothing, like lemon balm, chamomile or lavender

-       Cross over your energies so that you can access all of your thinking capacities

If you find yourself supporting a loved one, friend or colleague in a state overwhelm, and they appear to be fighting you

-       Take some flowing breaths and ground yourself

-       Help them establish what their intentions are

-       Rather than giving advice, ask what help they would find most beneficial

-       Keep yourself grounded and stand back and help them to assess the bigger picture